A Burglar Reveals 15 Trade Secrets

by Kevin Raposo
DIY Landscaping for Less photo

Ever wonder what a burglar looks for before breaking into your home? Simplisafe interviewed actual burglars to get answers, Here’s what they found out about how they break in and what they’re doing and looking for inside your home.

Ever wonder what goes through the mind of a burglar? Well, SimpliSafe home security sent a team of us out to hit the streets for some raw data. We got the chance to sit down with burglary professionals and ask them some real tough questions. It wasn’t easy getting these questions answered, but we got them! We gathered the most common answers and assembled them to give you an inside look into the mind of a burglar. It’s time for you to meet Bob, your local burglar.

Hello, my name is Bob and I’m your local neighborhood burglar! First I’m going to tell you what I look for before breaking into your home, and then I’m going to tell you how I can break into your home. I’ll even tell you what I’m doing and looking for inside your home.

A lot of people ask me why I do what I do, and why I haven’t been caught yet. Do you know what I tell them? Because people don’t realize how easy they make it for me. I shouldn’t be doing this, but I need a challenge!

What I’m Looking for To Make Your House My Next Target

Before picking a house, I have to scope the whole neighborhood. To do this, I’m not going to be walking in the traditional cat burglar uniform. I’m going to be walking around with a rake or dressed up as the cable, electric, or phone repairman. In some cases, I even post a flier on your door for a closer look. Usually my work hours are from 8 a.m. – 11 a.m. I want to avoid any kind of confrontation.

I like high privacy fences. This way, your pesky neighbors can’t sneak up on me or call the police. I also look for any sort of high vegetation, like trees or shrubbery, covering your windows. This way, they can’t see me break your window. I prefer lots of cover.

Toys or playground equipment in your yard are signs that kids live there, which to me equals a mother lives there and “cha-ching” that means jewelry.

I’ll post a flyer on your door to get a closer look of your home. I’m also checking to see if you have a burglar alarm.

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How I Break Into Your Home

I’ll knock on your door to see if anyone is home. If someone answers the door, I’ll just come up with some bogus story.

I’m going to check if the front or back door is unlocked. Sometimes people usually hide a key somewhere easy to access.

If I can’t find a key, I will check the windows. If worse comes to worse, I’ll just smash a window.

I can also get into a home through your doors using my trusty crowbar.

If I can’t make it into your house in one minute, I just move onto the next one.

What I’m Doing Once I’m Inside Your Home

I always use the same search pattern. I go straight to the master bedroom. I look for cash, jewelry, or anything that might be valuable. People often make the mistake of leaving money or jewelry in the most common areas. I’ll even look under the bed and in your closets.

I’m always listening for outside noises. It’s a sixth sense.

I check your bathroom medicine cabinets for any narcotic prescriptions. Pills are easy money.

I’m going to check your kitchen and living room for electronics, credit cards, car keys, and personal information.

After I have gathered everything I need, I call my backup driver to meet me so we can load up all the goods in the car or van.

Once I have loaded all the goods, my associate and I drive away to the next target. It’s a never-ending cycle.

And that’s it folks. It usually takes me about eight to twelve minutes to get in and out of your home. It’s as easy as that!

In closing, there are a lot of things that you can do to avoid someone like me. A security system is a no-brainer. If that’s not an option, leaving a TV or stereo on during the day usually helps someone like me avoid your home. This usually indicates someone is home. Also most burglars won’t even attempt entry if they know there’s a large dog in the home.

So now you know my methods and secrets. Hopefully, this will help you avoid bad guys like me. If not, I’ll be lurking around. So, once again, I’m Bob, your local Burglar, and I’ll be coming to a city near you!

Reviewed August 2023

About the Author

Kevin Raposo is a blogger for SimpliSafe. Kevin covers issues related to home security, crime, safety, and consumer issues. Kevin is a dedicated writer and musician, spreading the word through music and blogging. SimpliSafe is a leader in the wireless home security field.

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